LIFFe: Beginners

- You can ask me anything.

- Anything? What's that there?

- That's a tree.

- Yeah.

- And cars.

- Uh-huh.

- Another building like this one.

- Right.

- People in the building like us. Half of them think things will never work out. The other half believe in magic. It's like a war between them.

- "Eventually, Jesus grew old. He could no longer walk far and he could no longer preach in a loud voice. One day he announced to his apostles that he was departing. The three disciples prayed with him, gave him water, bathed and fed him. After gasping for breath for several days, one morning, just as dawn came, Jesus passed away."

- You rewrote Jesus' death?

- It was far too violent. We need new stories.

- Let's say, since you were little, and you always dreamed of some day getting a lion? And you wait and you wait and you wait and you wait, and the lion doesn't come. Then along comes a giraffe. You can be alone or you can be with the giraffe.

- I'd wait for the lion.

- That's why I worry about you.

- Why are you telling them you're turning the corner?

- Well...

- You have stage four cancer.

- It's not as bad as it sounds.

- Pop, there is no stage five.

- That's not what it means.

- Well, then what does it mean?

- It just means that it's been through three other stages.

- When you feel bad, you go into your room and scream as loud as you can for a minute or two and then it's out of you. It's called catharsis.

- I don't feel like screaming.

- You will.

- (talking to a dog) Go and have your own experiences with your own people. I'll be right here. I'm a human.

I'm not a dog. And you're a Jack Russell and that's a breed. Your personality was created by this guy, John Russell, who was a hunting enthusiast in the 1800s. And he bred your ancestors for their stamina and their courage for the hunt. You think you're you when you wanna chase the foxes, but other people planted that in you years ago. And now, somewhat arbitrarily, you're considered very cute by us humans. And we keep breeding you not to chase foxes, but to be cute. And we put you in television shows and movies, and you're chasing tennis balls because they're as close to a fox as you're gonna get.